Daily Joke for Jun 19, 2013

At the Reading of the Will

A lawyer was reading a wealthy man's will to the people mentioned in it.

"To my wife Claire, who stood by me through the rough times as well as the good, I leave you the house, the cars and $5 million."

The lawyer continued, "To my daughter Sarah, who took care of me during my illness and kept my company going, I leave you the yacht, the business and $2 million."

The lawyer concluded, "And, to my cousin Phil, who always hated me, argued with me, was envious of me, and thought I would never mention him in my will ... well, you're wrong. 'Hi, Phil!'"

Daily Joke for Jun 18, 2013

Microsoft's Useless

A helicopter was flying in Seattle when suddenly an electrical malfunction disabled all electronic navigation and communication equipment.

Due to the amount of fog, the pilot could not determine the helicopter's position. He spotted a tall building, flew toward it, circled, and held up a handwritten sign that said "WHERE AM I?" in large letters. People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew a large sign, and held it in a building window. Their sign said "YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER."

The pilot thanked them by smiling and waving, determined the route to SEATAC airport and landed safely. When they were finally on the ground, his co-pilot asked him how he'd done it.

"I knew it had to be the Microsoft building, because they gave me a technically correct but utterly and completely useless answer."